it's amazing to me to think of how many times we think we have to scream and yell at god to touch him.
and how many times he's laughing at us, cause we're yelling and screaming and he's wanting us to whisper a love song in his ear. or maybe it's more like we're jumping and singing at the top of our lungs, and God's got his arms out trying to wrap us up in them. so often, i think we overlook the intimacy with God as charismatics and consider it "laziness". it's not laziness to lay on the floor of an altar in absolute silence and enjoy God. it's called basking in his presence, and it changes lives. there are moments when i need to get violent for the kingdom, and those times are often. and then there are times when i need to just SHUT UP and wait upon the lord. do you really think i could have gone this long on praise band without god's help? i have to wait on him. i have to trust in him with every step that i take. and that means i have to be silent long enough to hear what my next step is. it's really okay to be silent before the lord. sometimes not speaking at all is louder than yelling, transcending all shouting and screaming. maybe silence penetrates God's ears more so than the loud things.
i like to just sit in his presence. i like to listen to him sing love over me, speak peace over me. i like to crawl up in his lap and just rest. and i especially like it when he holds me. secures me in his arms and just holds me there until i'm ready to get up. and these are the times when i feel the most inspired to write, to sing, to dance before the lord...the times when i'm submissive to his mindset and his wills. i want him to do what he wants to do. that's something that makes me stronger than i was yesterday. the fact that i want god and nothing less. because what god has for me is the best out there, and anything that god says no to, it's because he has something greater for me than what my finite and simple mind can even imagine. everything i think is the best...yeah, it's rubbish to god.
"no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has concieved what God has in store for those who love Him."
-first corinthians chapter two verse nine-
hello, my name is
- jessica ann-lynn.
- i am a violent, passionate lover of the One who made me. He is the Object of my affections and my desires. He has given me desires, to sing, write, play piano, and dance for His glory. He gave me the desire to read, to learn, to grow. my obsession with the rain makes sense to Him. the things that make up the core of who i am belong to Him. He is the most beautiful thing i could imagine. and He is the center of every single thing i do.
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